Oops

I lost a week to being sad last week. I didn’t mean too, I did the normal things, cleaned, laundry, cooked, visited friends and even did yoga twice, but I didn’t move forward in studying or job hunting.

My mom has cancer, just writing that tears me up inside. It is one of my great dreads come to life, her been sick so very faraway from me, no way I can just check to make sure she is getting good care, no way I can see she is eating ok, no way I can just chat to her. The six hour time difference as of today – thanks daylight savings time – and her been tired a lot means I am reduced to ‘whatsapp’ and text and if lucky facebook messenger. Yes, I know I am lucky I have these things, but what I wouldn’t give to be closer, driving distance? Even states away would be better, instead I obsessively check flight costs to home and worry.

Tomorrow her doctor should tell her the treatment options and outcomes. My dad survived cancer, my aunt did, and I have hope my mom will, but she seems so tired and that worries me.

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