i think i am making myself sick from sheer unhappiness. i did this before and got an ulcer, and i used to get sick as a child when worried or scared. i cannot eat and i know i should, i realise that, but the thought of food makes me feel nauseous. being with the person i love makes me feel better – i even sleep better but that is not practical, because then i am making them responsible for me and only i am responsible for me.

LOVE’S SECRET

by: William Blake (1757-1827)

Never seek to tell thy love,
Love that never told can be;
For the gentle wind doth move
Silently, invisibly.

I told my love, I told my love,
I told her all my heart,
Trembling, cold, in ghastly fears.
Ah! she did depart!

Soon after she was gone from me,
A traveller came by,
Silently, invisibly:
He took her with a sigh